That's right, he was stabbed in the chest for his Powerbook.

I am an impatient technophile, and even I wouldn't bust out my laptop at a baseball game.

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Talk nerdy to me.

For every person, a fetish. ...For every fetish, a Web site.

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Don't be a punk, update your junk.

This is going to sting a little bit, but it's for your own good.

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There are smelly, misunderstood people around the world.

Geeks and nerds have not been exactly what one would call fashion-forward. Sure, it's a stereotype, but its one that holds water.

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A new kind of power struggle.

"Hey, is there an outlet around here?"

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The incredible sloth of being.

The upside of the Internet: You never have to leave your house. The downside of the Internet: You never leave your house because you never have to.

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Don't sue Apple because your iPod deafens you. Sue Apple because iPods break if you look at them wrong.

This is to the dude squeezing tomatoes rather creepily in Trader Joe's who was rocking out to The Killers.

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Dorks and nerds and geeks, oh my!

Picture the Moscone Center in San Francisco. It looms across the street from Yerba Buena gardens, a shining structure of steel and glass.

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Become one with your subcutaneous chip.

I bet you have a wallet full of cards. Most of the time, you probably have the basics on you— student ID card, your driver's license and a debit or credit card. Others of us have a flurry of rewards cards—supermarkets, pet supply stores, bookstores.

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This will become part of your permanent record.

Try to remember what you were like when you were 11 years old. Trapped between the sandbox of childhood and the sheer horror of adolescence; irresponsible but optimistic. Knowing enough not to run with scissors, yet not to be trusted with matches.

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aim, irl, omg

Ladies and gentlemen, we have made ourselves so deliciously stalkable. Our blogs, our profiles, the polls we fill out, the mailing lists we're on - they all say things about us, and we leave sasquatch-sized footprints all over cyberspace.

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It's a blog eat blog world.

SixApart bought Livejournal; eBay bought Skype; Microsoft wants to buy AOL. But who's going to buy our Excedrin once we're all finished reading the new Terms of Service agreements?

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About J Poole

Articles Posted: 13
Links Seeded: 0
Member Since: 1/2006Last Seen: 2/10/2009

Hi there. I write this column "Byte Me" for my college newspaper; I'm a bit of a geek if you couldn't tell already. Rock on.

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